Archive for May, 2011

  • About Me In 15 Questions
    Posted by on May 18th, 2011 at 9:36 am, Comments: 0

    Four or five years ago, a reader of some of my columns bought the domain name and gave it to me as a birthday […]

  • Why I Would Rather Shoot Myself In the Head Than Own a Home
    Posted by on May 15th, 2011 at 8:34 pm, Comments: 0

    I only had one friend in MySpace when I joined in 2005. “Tom”. In fact, all 100 million people who had joined MySpace had one […]

  • An Idea I Had that Went Down the Drain
    Posted by on May 13th, 2011 at 10:47 am, Comments: 0

    I was in the process of separating from my ex-wife and the pain was bordering on suicidal. At the same time my whole family was […]

  • The One Week Heroin Addict
    Posted by on May 12th, 2011 at 11:09 am, Comments: 0

    “Listen,” I said to the nurse and now I feel bad about it, “I called in for a PERCOCET prescription. You told me, ‘Done!’ and […]

  • Its Your Fault
    Posted by on May 10th, 2011 at 8:55 pm, Comments: 0

    At Barnes & Noble at Union Square a cop approached me, “Sir?” right after I walked in. When a cop approaches you so many things […]

  • Acne Vulgaris
    Posted by on May 9th, 2011 at 3:31 am, Comments: 0

    I had these huge purple cysts covering my face when I was a teenager. Once a month my dad would take me to a doctor […]

  • When $12 million was stolen and nobody did anything about it
    Posted by on May 8th, 2011 at 9:55 am, Comments: 0

    $30mm invested with David." data-image="" data-button=""> Share

    “We’ve determined he’s stolen at least $12 million cash from his investors and put it in a Swiss bank account under his own name. We […]

    $30mm invested with David." data-image="" data-button=""> Share
  • Me and Jay Leno
    Posted by on May 7th, 2011 at 9:11 am, Comments: 0

    I wrote a book and decided to call it “How to be the luckiest person alive!” But I didn’t feel so lucky when I woke […]

  • All You Have to do is Ask
    Posted by on May 5th, 2011 at 9:21 am, Comments: 0

    The guy laughed right in my face. “You have no business card.  You’re not dressed in a suit. Your official office phone is a cell […]

  • I’m a bit afraid today
    Posted by on May 3rd, 2011 at 8:45 am, Comments: 0

    “Henry Krinkle” commented on my post “I want my daughters to be lesbians” that not only did I want my daughters initially to be aborted, […]