How should a single person find someone?
Clint Smith @thecrint: how should a single person find someone? Pitfalls to avoid?
I’m ashamed to admit this: I’ve basically never given myself a chance to be alone. I always went from one relationship to the next. Which, of course, led to many unpleasant relationships. I think I was afraid to be alone. But consequently, I feel like I’ve mastered the art of meeting someone:
Step one: Be everywhere they are. Where are they? If you are a man, the women are in dance classes, cooking classes, art classes, and on online dating services. I met Claudia on J-Date.
Step two: Don’t be afraid to ask. Start asking out everyone you think is attractive. It works. Practice today. Don’t be afraid of rejection. You see someone on the street say, “Nice dress”. If she smiles back, maybe ask her out. Don’t be rude. Just be pleasant about it.
Step three: It’s quantity first, then quality. Ask out as many people as possible. Go out on as many dates as you possibly can. Do coffee in the afternoon with one, dinner at night with another. Quantity.
Step four: Quality: The only way you will find quality is to cut your losses. How do you cut your losses. This is goal-driven. Make sure your goal is not simply: “to have sex” or “to get a girlfriend”. You want someone who likes you. Who doesn’t do “The Rules” of trying to “neg” you or make you chase after her or anything that smells like a game. The theme of what you want is someone who likes you, who is easy to be with, where things happen naturally. Cut IMMEDIATELY anyone who doesn’t go along with that theme, even if you are amazingly attracted to them.
Does this seem sexist? Of course some women go to tech meetups or chess clubs. But at the average tech meetup it’s about a 9:1 ratio. I don’t like gambling in situations where the odds are against me. If your goal is to meet someone, go where the odds are on your side. Or, as Wayne Gretzky says, “I don’t skate to where the puck is, I skate to where the puck is going”.
- How to Self-Publish a Bestseller: Publishing 3.0
- 7 Things Happen to You When You Are Completely Honest
- How to Deal With Crappy People
- 10 More Reasons You Need to Quit Your Job Right Now!
- The 100 Rules for Being an Entrepreneur
- 33 Unusual Tips to Being a Better Writer
- How to be THE LUCKIEST GUY ON THE PLANET in 4 Easy Steps
- 10 Unusual Things I Didn’t Know About Steve Jobs
- 8 Alternatives to College
- I’m Completely Humiliated by Yoga
- How I Screwed Yasser Arafat out of $ 2mm (and lost $ 100mm in the process)
- Ep. 65: Dan Ariely: Dishonesty, Irrationality, and Money
- Ep 64 – Tucker Max: Surprise Announcement! Part 1
- 10 Things I Learned While Interviewing Tony Robbins About His New Book “Money”
- Ep. 62 – Tony Robbins: Money Is Just A Game
- Ep. 61 – Trip Adler: Overnight Success 7 Years in the Making
- Nothing Is Wrong With You
- Ep. 59 – Brian Koppelman Ruined My Life
- 21 or 22 Yet Even More Amazing Tips to Be a Better Writer
- Ep. 54 – Gabriel Weinberg: The Man Who is Fighting Google
- The Idea Matrix – What Changed Everyone’s Life After “Choose Yourself”
- Life is Like a Game. Here’s How You Master ANY Game
- Step By Step Guide to Make $10 Million And Then Totally Blow It
- Can You Do One Page a Day?
- The Secrets of Personal Finance
- 10 Things You Need to Know To Become a Great Leader
- OK. One Quote from Robin Williams