The Penultimate Rules On Being More Creative

Albert-Einstein

“You know that ‘penultimate’ means ‘second’, right?” she said to me. I forget why. But it was in an horribly embarrassing situation. I remember that. I remember thinking I thought ‘penultimate’ meant ‘number one’. ‘You know it’s not the best. It’s the SECOND best,” she repeated. I remember the blush. I remember her asking the […] Read On…

What’s The Point In Life?

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I visited a friend of mine in jail. He had been protesting a war. Whenever you protest 18 year olds being killed, there’s a chance you can get arrested. When he was in the county jail, he took off all his clothes and tried to flush them down the toilet. They had forgotten to give […] Read On…

Using the 5/25 Rule to Learn to Say “No”

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When I was 12 I was obsessed with a book on my parents’ shelf. “Don’t Say Yes When You Want to Say No”. A pop psychology book from the 70’s all about sex. I would pretend to be sick. Stay home from school. Read the book over and over again, fascinated by the stories. Too […] Read On…

Death of a Middleman

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My friend asked, do you know a good agent? I thought of my last book agent. We had gone to college together. We had done four book deals together. We had made a lot of money for each other. Then I fired him… I told my friend why. Here’s what my middleman did: After I […] Read On…

Teach Your Kid How To Kill People…

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I taught Mollie poker. I told her you have to learn how to kill people and this is the easiest way to start. She said, “What do you mean?” “You have to want to destroy me. To confuse me. To lie to me. To completely obliterate me, take all my money, and laugh in my […] Read On…

I Miss Nothing…

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They fired me as CEO because I was so bad. A few months later they kicked me off the board of directors. I lost a ton of money and all my friends. I wish I had just done nothing. I wish I had read books. I wish I had written that novel. I wish I […] Read On…